Say hello to my little friends

Ever since last Wednesday and the Very Bad Thing that has happened, I've been a bit down in the dumps.  Life, it would seem, is frequently unfair.  Life likes to torment and mock me at every available opportunity.  Life... is not a very nice person sometimes.

But I digress.

So there I am, wallowing in my own self-pity on Wednesday night, when B comes into the bedroom with a look on his face that can best be described as a combination of "I'm about to spring MORE bad news on you and I'm SO sorry" and "I am both horrified and disgusted at the same time".

He then proceeds to explain that for the past two nights and early mornings (we're night owls!) our kitchen has been taken over by slugs.

SLUGS!!!

I'm in ur kitchen, sliming up ur everything...

The most slimy, unhygienic, creepy crawlie little pests known to mankind!!  Have you ever seen the movie Slither?  THAT'S WHAT OUR FREAKIN' KITCHEN LOOKED LIKE!!

Shudder.  I'd love to be able to share a photo of the 10-15ish slugs that were scaling our back door that night, but I was too busy trying to stifle my gag reflex to think of fetching my camera.

Needless to say we both sprang into action, becoming a two-man Slug Extermination Squad.  I am a whizz with salt... I really am.  And the next day, after some extensive research involving typing the phrase "Get these slugs out of my house NOW" into Google, B came up with a defense plan so complex that he should immediately be headhunted by homeland security departments worldwide.

And since then?  Not a sign of a slug... probably because they can't get within 50 feet of the house, due to a complex array of slug pellets, salt and duct tape.

Apparently having a slug infestation is a pretty common occurrence at this time of year, in houses of a certain age, according to some websites B found.  As if that makes it okay.  I'd only JUST made my peace with having spiders in the house.

Shudder.